The Party, Part Three: The Final Chapter

So me and selena are no longer an item. I guess she had already agreed to go out with this other guy and that ended up working out alright.

Tonight, Part Deux

Well dear reader, after a phone call from selena, I want back to the party. It was absolutely amazing. There are no words I can use to describe it. Suffice it to say that this is the best friday night/saturday morning in recent memory, if not the best one of all time. Yes. It was that awesome. I'll give away details if you ask me or comment or whatnot, but I'm not going to give away spoilers here, because you may not be interested. Then again, you might. Also, the time that it says I posted this isn't really the time. *Winks.* Have a good rest of the weekend, reader. If you see me, I'll be the guy with cartoon hearts over his head.

Some Party!

So yeah, the jazz band had its "third week of the the term" party and it was pretty great. The only bad thing was that there were so many goddamn people there that it was impossible to talk with anyone. The music was great and people were definitely having a really good time, but the most important person there (Selena) was with a clique of her friends. It was cool, though, I danced with her for like a half hour (well maybe "next to her" would be a better phrase). But the music was too loud and the people were shouting and yelling so profusely that I literally could not get in a word with her. I mean we were three feet away for 30 minutes but I never even could say "Hi," because it was too loud. Call me old-fashione if you will, but I like my parties small and intimate, where I know at least half the people. Sure, there were plenty of people there to talk to 'n' such, but it was so ridiculously loud that conversation was practically impossible.

I'm serious, though, Selena's friends formed this impenetrable shield around her for at least an hour. It was one of those groups that are so tightly knit that you're afraid to even dance next to them for fear of intrusion. I'd have to say the party was a success overall, seeing as I just came from it and still feel great. In case you're wondering why I left at 12:30 from a kickin' party, it was because it was almost TOO kickin'. There's such a thing as too many people (50 or 60) in a small room dancing and screaming. I'm all for enjoying yourself, but the party had reached a point where I would either be bored soon or hot or irritated with everyone soon, so I left before I got to that point. Considering my mission was to flirt and/or dance with Selena, I'd give myself a 50% out of a possible 100. I did dance with her, though, and it was nice for awhile, but there's only so much you can accomplish in terms of advancing (or starting, for that matter) a relationship without words being present. So I checked out before things got lame. If that makes me a loser, then I'm a loser.

Suffering & Happiness

So, after a really long conversation with a good friend of mine, I was floored by the negativity with which some people live their lives. I had known previously, but was unable to convince myself, that people could really view suffering as the only virtue, the only way in which they can help others. This is so ridiculous that I want to laugh out loud at the sheer absurdity of it. What is the point of human existence, if not to be happy? Isn't that the underlying goal of the actions of every man and woman? If you try to live your life not for yourself, but solely to make everyone around you happy, you will be miserable all your days. Misery breeds misery and the only thing accomplished by misery is to spread it like the disease it is. If everyone sacrificed themselves for the good of their fellow man and ignored their own happiness, the earth would be filled with miserable people. No one should ever sacrifice themselves for the good of others -- you should teach others how to be happy while maintaining your own goals and values. The moment that someone asks you to sacrifice YOUR life, which belongs to YOU and no one else, for their own happiness, is the moment you should turn your back on them. No one is capable of accomplishing anything by being miserable -- the only justifiable suffering is if it is part of a grander plan to make you happy in the long run. If you truly love and respect the people around you, the people who care for you, then you must know that they want you to be happy as well as themselves. The belief in yourself and the belief in your right to be happy is the belief in life -- the belief in self-sacrifice and suffering is the belief in death and misery. Your life is a precious gift -- whether given by some divine being or by mother nature, I know not -- but I do know this: it is not to be wasted by being miserable. If I believed in God I would think he'd be pretty mad at humans for throwing away their lives in this manner. I don't believe in God, though, and maybe this quote will help you understand why.

"The philosophy of Atheism represents a concept of life without any metaphysical Beyond or Divine Regulator. It is the concept of an actual, real world with its liberating, expanding and beautifying possibilities, as against an unreal world, which, with its spirits, oracles, and mean contentment has kept humanity in helpless degradation." ~ Emma Goldman

Joy -- the sheer, wonderful joy that every human being is capable of feeling -- whether at his accomplishments or his good deeds or his supreme creative power and ability -- is all that matters.

"The same stream of life that runs through my veins night and day runs through the world and dances in rhythmic measures. It is the same life that shoots in joy through the dust of the earth in numberless blades of grass and breaks into tumultuous waves of leaves and flowers. It is the same life that is rocked in the ocean-cradle of birth and of death, in ebb and in flow. I feel my limbs are made glorious by the touch of this world of life. And my pride is from the life-throb of ages dancing in my blood this moment." ~ Rabindranath Tagore

Another issue which was brought up was the futility of life. What's the point of living in the moment if the moment is soon gone? This is also ridiculous. What's the point of living at all if you're going to ignore every moment that it takes place in? Love is a series of moments, being happy is a series of moments, joy is all too often temporary. To ignore these moments is to ignore life itself.

"Love the moment. Flowers grow out of dark moments. Therefore, each moment is vital. It affects the whole. Life is a succession of such moments and to live each, is to succeed." ~ Corita Kent

If that is confusing to you, I'm truly sorry. If you believe that suffering and tragedy and other people's needs and values come before your own, I'm sorry. If you cannot take charge of your own life, your own destiny, why bother? I could quote all day, but I have one last one and then I'll shut up. It is the summary of my beliefs, said better than I could. I leave you with this:

"My will shall shape the future. Whether I fail or succeed shall be no man's doing but my own. I am the force; I can clear any obstacle before me or I can be lost in the maze. My choice; my responsibility; win or lose, only I hold the key to my destiny." ~ Elaine Maxwell

Well I Don't Know Why I Came Here Tonight, I Got The Feelin' That Somethin' Ain't Right.

Here's how my day began: I was in the shower, reading the instructions on my conditioner bottle (I was curious about how long to leave it in for) and, as my brand happens to be Herbal Essences, the instructions were really weird. The bottle makes reference to exhilaration, joy, obsession, intensity, and just about every other adjective that could possibly be taken as having a sexual meaning without ever saying it. My position is: Herbal Essences should stop with the groaning women in commercials and just flat out say it: "If you use this product, it will cause you to experience an intense orgasm." We've all had enough of the cute hinting around, OK?? I, personally, have used Herbal Essences shampoo and conditioner for quite a while (I like the way it smells) and have never experienced orgasm from either of said products. Can I sue for false advertising or not, since they don't actually state that that's why everyone who uses the product is moaning in pleasure?

Just in case that isn't enough proof that we are truly living in a neurotic, hypocritical society, I refer you to http://datetosave.com, which is (I can't decide) an excellent joke or extremely frightening. The very idea, the notion of the website is nothing less than 100%, unrefined evil. The kind of evil that makes you throw up a little in your mouth. The kind of evil that confirms your darkest suspicions about humanity. The kind of evil that makes you lose faith in your fellow men and women. The kind of evil that....well I'm out of descriptions but you get it. Hyperbole aside, I was shocked and amused by the website (amused after my cynic took over) and you will be too.

Something else of note: Crossfire, on CNN, was canceled. Apparently Tucker Carlson quit, but I can't help speculating that it had something to do with Jon Stewart going on the show, and, quite literally, ripping them a new one. The pain on the hosts' faces could only be attributed to having new holes ripped in their body, physically or only psychologically. In fact, in the article, the President of CNN said he agreed with Stewart's take on the situation, which was to say that an excellent opportunity for political discourse was being shamefully wasted on high-decibel shouting matches and slogan-swapping. I must say I'm pleased overall.

Someone needs to take this laser pointer away from us. Me and my roommate and other suitemates have been using it today and yesterday, shining it out the window and at the feet of passers-by, irritating several of them in a major way. The best was a couple walking back to their dorms. They noticed it once, and stopped. Looking around in a confused manner, they pointed at the totally wrong dorm. They continued on, but I shined the snowbank ahead of them. This time the guy flipped off the whole building (still the wrong building), turned about 10 degrees, flipped off the building again, and repeated this 3 or 4 times. Needless to say, we were hysterical with mirth at these antics. It works particularly well since we have about 3 inches of snow. Anyways, if you've got a story about laser pointers or other pranks you've pulled on people, feel free to share. I'll be laughing about this for quite some time.

Degenerative Brain Disorders and Other Reasons Why Your Professor Wears a Sweater From 1977

The sleet is sleeting, the roads are frozen, and I'm warm and dry in my dorm room. That's right kiddies, Adam got a class canceled today. So at my Biology class, the professor shows up and says, "If I was an ordinary professor, I wouldn't have come in today. But I like to walk to campus, and the sidewalks aren't nearly as bad as the roads are." Apparently my Psychology professor is an ordinary professor, because I got an email saying that she couldn't make it in because of the weather. Speaking of professors, my Bio prof is hilarious. He's only like 30 years old, but he's got the trappings of the senile old professor already. He's got the requisite fuzzy sweater made in the 70s, the glasses, and the really awful jokes. This morning's was especially bad. We were discussing mitosis and he says, "A female member of the department liked to say, 'Mitosis happens in my toeses, and meiosis happens in my ovaries.' Of course, that doesn't really apply to me, and, 'Meiosis happens in my testes' doesn't really rhyme, so it uh, doesn't exactly work for the males...."

After this bombshell of a joke is dropped on the classroom, a stunned silence filled the air. After what seemed like years, a few of the "teacher's pet" - type of students laughed in a manner that can only be described as "hesitant." If I could read minds, I'm sure theirs would be something like: Oh my God, what the hell was that joke about? Did he just make a joke about a joke about Mitosis and Meiosis. Sweet Jesus, that was awful. You could see the pained expressions on their faces, and it was obvious that these individuals either had a truly terrible sense of humor, or were fucking diehard teacher's pets. The look on their faces was something like what you get when you have exceptionally violent diarrhea, or when you get punched in the gut. Kind of a painful and nauseating combination.

Yep, if you haven't figured it out already, I'm back at school in chilly Illinois. Also, if you hadn't figured it out until just now, please stop reading this blog forever. Seriously. You better not keep reading after this entry, I swear to god. Don't even check my profile for new entries, asshole.